Many people have gotten that frantic call from a close friend or relative: “help me my marriage is in trouble!” Sadly, this happens all too frequently and many times we just don’t want to get draged into someone elses problems. But as an outsider looking in, sometimes we have to get involved and offer our help.
Having a third party look over the relationship to find the areas that need help,can be very beneficial. Sometimes, it is something as simple as lending an ear. A sympathetic and caring shoulder to shed a few tears on is often jall that is needed if the spouse is not going to listen. Incredibly, having the oppertunity to unload some anxiety and built-up emotions can be of great benefit a couple in the thick of repairing their marriage.
The boundaries are not always laid out in a clear and consice manor in these cases, so caution should always be exercised. A femal becoming too heavily involved in a marital quandary will be seen as a “relationship trespasser” by the husband. He will feel as if it is now two against one – and he is now becoming unfairely “ganged-up on”. Even if the wrongs are corrected, chances are he will never look at the friend the same way again.
That is why exercising discretion has to be paramount. If you are not mindfull it can be very easy to step over the line, accidently creating more damage than was originally present. The only time that it is a good idea to to get involved is when there is clear and concise evidence that he is the prime reason cause of the dispute. If it becomes obvious that it is the man that is the main reason behind what is transpiring then a friend can only really be of assistance to his wife. However, this would never work for a man. If a female friend were to try to console the husband, it might appear as if she is trying to break up the marriage.
The safest bet is for the friend to suggest counseling to the couple. Only by contacting and employing an outsider with no a vested interest in either members will bring stability once again. But even this decision needs to be cautiously considered. If a woman is the reason for the disturbance in the relationship then a male counselor might be the better option. If the wife has been cheating on her husband, then more than likely a lady counselor would be more applicable.
The bottom line is, if you ask a friend ” to help you save a relationship”, then it has to be discreetly handled and in a way that will not place attention or blame on one party more than another othere wise you may well ask one day “How to win your ex back” due to a total relationship break down them “how to win back your ex” because of a total break down of your relationship .
So far there's (just?) 0 comments on this post - join in and add one »